onlybloodypeepshow:

Series 4, Episode 3: ‘Gym’

(via stayforthecredits)

That’s cheating! Anyone can pleasure a woman if they tell you what to do! The point is you’re not allowed to ask. — Jeremy (Series 5, Episode 5: ‘Jeremy’s Manager’)

(via shitjezsays)

Jez getting in touch with his inner Pete Campbell

Jez getting in touch with his inner Pete Campbell

(via shitjezsays)

I’m genuinely terrified of this happening every single time I use a French press. One day I’m going to forget to hold the handle and I’ll burn my whole self, just watch. 

(via ashimmyandashake)

I’m not a cock. But the cock has certainly crowed. Thrice!

When? What are you talking about?

It means you’ve betrayed me. It’s the New Testament. You cock. 

(via mr-pharmacist-deactivated201207)